So Long

The time has come for the next step in the healing process. To do this I must walk out the door of the house of my old life and go on a walk-a-bout in the half world that is neither old nor new. How long it will take, I do not know, a day, a week, a month a year? No telling. But I must lock the door tight so the past does not follow me, whispering to me of my hypocrisy as I combine the two halves of myself into one. Scouring out the old ideas, beliefs and false assumptions so I can start anew, whole and fresh.

I am closing this site down during this period of time. In the past I have simply wiped everything out. Instead, I am going to change the privacy level so no one can read it. When the time is right, when I know what it is I wish to bring forward into my new state of being, I will reopen the appropriate posts and begin to add new ones.

I thank you all for being my witness. I will not be gone forever. Knowing my love of writing, it will probably be sooner rather then later.
Take care,
I hold you in my heart,
Zen

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Liisi Pool
    Jun 28, 2012 @ 03:38:57

    Hey!

    I accidentally landed on your page via chinese medicine couple of days ago.
    I wish you all the best! You write beautifully! I do admire your spirit.

    Virtual hugs,
    Liz

    PS! Ajahn Brahm’s talks (via youtube) have helped me to reach understanding about life and stuff 🙂

    Reply

    • Zenobia
      Jun 28, 2012 @ 11:47:42

      Thank you for your well wishes. I am in a wonderful place in life right now. I have let go a knot of rage that I have carried for a long time. Now there is room for other, better stuff. I just need to give myself space while I decide what I want to fill it with. It is so easy, once you learn a new concept of living, to be drawn back into the old paradigm, due to guilt or embarrassment or just plain feeling stupid because you realize that what you have done for the last 30 years was dumb so you feel like you need to defend it. *shaking my head* I am looking forward to writing more, in fact, one of my friends just got bombarded by emails because I do love to write. Poor guy. I just don’t want my past writing to influence this particular transition. I am so glad that you wrote to me. Another of my friends has said that I need to write a book. I don’t have the patience for extending plot making, I love working on this blog. Your encouragement warms my heart and makes me smile.
      Thank you,
      Carrie

      Reply

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